Gravity Falls Next Gen: Acting like Animals!
by Lizard Master
Summary: The kids of Dipper, Wendy, Mabel, Mermando, and Candy go on an adventure to investigate illegally retrieved zoo animals, but soon get more than what they bargained for!


This is a story with the next gen characters of Gravity Falls that fanfics4ever and I made. See my Deviantart account Fyrekobra for more information about them. What they look like, and their personalities.

Here's a link to the main character of the group.

fanfics4ever/art/Annabel-Pines-OC-description-2-604923788

Tara: Here's a gift for you Tyrone!

(Tara kisses him)

Marisol: She's doing it! They're in love!  
Annabel: He's so lucky to have people like her in his life!  
Delmar: I KNEW they'd do it soon!  
Tyrone: Thanks Tara. (Blushes)

(Annabel starts thinking about the events that led to this moment)

Annabel(In her thoughts): Tara's kissing Tyrone! He deserves love like this. To think, it all started with my plan. It didn't even revolve around romance with them. As the kids of famous mystery solvers, we've solved plenty of supernatural mysteries, but I wanted to do something more, like solve a case for justice. It took me a while, but I finally found what I was looking for. Our target was an endangered animal rights activist, zoologist, and zookeeper. A real hotshot collector. He seemed respectable enough, opening high quality zoos across the world, and had even opened up a new zoo just outside town, but I could smell that something was up. Rumor has it that this billionare, named Jacob Sarnoc, was dealing in black market endangered animals worth millions. He even has his own private army. So, naturally, I figured that he should either stop the illegal trafficking of animals, return them to their natural habitat, or share the wealth. Grandpa Ford invented a teleporter to take the animals back to their natural habitats. In order for the machine to work, we needed an object, plant, or animal from that place. Our Uncle Soos agreed to take us to the new zoo, just outside town. Earlier tonight, we arrived at the zoo, just a few hours after it had closed for the day. Our mission was to free some of the illegally bought animals from the zoo, and expose Jacob for dealing with these criminals, and hopefully the criminals as well.

(A flashback starts, Soos and Melody drive the kids to the zoo. They park in the parking lot at approximately 9:35PM. The kids hop out of the truck and head to the main entrance.)

Annabel: Okay everyone, we'll stay in radio contact with our walkie talkies if we get seperated, but we need to stick together.  
Tyrone: I got it, but what animal will we free?  
Marisol: Most likely several. According to this list, there are TONS of animals that few, if any zoos have. Not all of them are endangered, but they were ALL brought in illegally. Golden Lion Tamarins, Saltwater Crocodiles, Mediterranean Monk Seals, Thick Billed Parrots, Long Beaked Echidnas, you name it!  
Delmar: We'll go for the Golden Lion Tamarins first! I love those little monkeys!  
Tara: Will they even be easy to get?  
Annabel: Not the point Tara.  
Delmar: We'll get the job done Tara! What could possibly go wrong?  
Marisol: Famous last words! Look guys, we only get one shot at this, so no screwing up! Delmar, stay close to me!

Delmar- what, you think I'm gonna screw up?  
Annabel- most of our plans go awry whenever you go on your own.  
Marisol- and that's because you don't think before you act!

Tara: Marisol, use the grappling hook! The door's locked.

(Marisol pulls the grappling hook out of her bookbag, and creates a climbing rope over the gate, which the kids climb over into the zoo. When they get on the ground, they go over to the gift shop and grab a map)

Annabel: The Golden Lion Tamarin enclosure is in the South America area. We have to go over there.  
Delmar: I wonder if any guards are around here?  
Tyrone: I'm scared now! (Hugs Annabel)  
Annabel(chuckles): Ty, as long as we stick together, we shouldn't run into any guards.

(As the group heads towards the South America area, the see 2 guards by an "Employees only" building carrying assault rifles)

Delmar: Guards! Be quiet!

(Fortunatley, the guards don't notice our heroes as they sneak through the zoo to the Golden Lion Tamarin enclosure)

Annabel: This zoo is huge!  
Marisol: Jacob Sarnoc must have spent a fortune on this place! This zoo has some animals that few, if any other zoos have! Cassowaries, Tree Kangaroos, Giant Japanese Salamanders, Kodkods, Sea Otters, Asian Elephants, Japanese Macaques-  
Tara: We get it! It's got it all!  
Delmar: I wanted to hear the entire list.  
Tyrone: Me too, but we've got work to do.  
Annabel: Great thinking!

(Eventually, the kids arrive at the enclosure for the Golden Lion Tamarins)

Annabel: We need to be quiet. Tamarins are small, and easily scared.  
Tyrone: I know that. I watch nature documentaries.  
Delmar: I didn't know that!  
Marisol: If you paid more attention to those documentaries rather than how cute those monkeys were, you'd probably know.  
Tara: Someone's coming! Hide!

(The kids jump into a bush as a golf cart with a turret mounted to the back, and 3 guards with shotguns riding in it drives by, shining their flashlights on the sleeping Tamarins.)

Guard #1: Everything seems to be in order. Why does the boss want security beefed up tonight? We just had our opening day!  
Guard #2: I know, it seems stupid to have all of these patrols out guarding these animals. Our security is top notch! No one's gonna poach ANY of these animals! They're safe already!  
Guard #3: Obviously, but if the boss wants these animals to have extra protection, I'm not gonna argue.

(The guards turn their flashlights away from the sleeping Tamarins and drive off. The kids then get out of the bush)

Annabel- OK, we're gonna have to be extra careful. Something tells me those guys won't go easy on us just because we're kids.  
Tara- seriously, a turret and machine guns? How rich is this guy?  
Marisol- probably rich enough to buy Auntie Pacifica's parents and sell them at a garage sale.

Tyrone: Actually, he IS. According to sources Annabel told me about, he actually attended some of their parties when he was just getting started with his zoos.  
Delmar: When we're done, we should probably ask Auntie Pacifica about this.  
Marisol: Right now, we've got work to do.

(From a shed nearby, the kids get an animal carrier)

Annabel: Okay, we need to also get inside the enclosure. It's an open air enclosure with high walls and water keeping the monkeys in, so we need to use that bridge by the entrance over there.

(Marisol picks the lock to the door and the kids enter. Fortunatley, their luck holds as even though the monkeys are surprised and awakened by the kids, the don't make a fuss, because they've been hardened by all the other stuff they had to endure to get to the zoo)

Tara: We have to make this quick! We need to get one of the monkeys and get out of here before the guards come back!  
Delmar: I say we also get one of those California Condors in the North America area!  
Tara: One thing at a time! Let's get to work!  
Tyrone- hey, these guys seem really trained, watch. *points at the carrier and the monkey hops in*  
*soon all the monkey follow the other one and begin hopping in as well*  
Marisol- well "monkey see, monkey do!"

(The kids all laugh at the joke. Meanwhile, another guard is patrolling the entrance to the zoo, where he finds the grappling hook.)

Guard: Uh oh. This doesn't look good! I'd better tell the boss about this!

(At the "Employees only" building, Jacob Sarnoc is talking to his soldiers and unloading some more endangered animals into holding pens until they're taken to their permanent enclosures)

Jacob: I don't care how long it takes, you keep at it until the animals are comfortable. I want this zoo to be my magnum opus!  
Soldier: Um, okay. Where should we put the Java Rhinoceros?  
Jacob: In the Aisa area, of course! That's where they naturally live! Be careful with her! She's pregnant, and bound to give birth any day now! This critically endangered rhino needs its numbers to rise!  
Soldier: I think I know what you're gonna say now sir.  
Jacob: What would that be?  
Soldier: Something along the lines of "The human population needs to drop a few billion."  
Jacob: Ha! You know me too well! Inhuman as it may be, we need to-

(Just then, the guard who found the grappling hook bursts into the building)

Guard: Mr. Sarnoc Sir! I think there are intruders in the zoo!  
Jacob: Where?!  
Guard: I dunno just yet, but I found this grappling hook by the gates and gift shop. (He hands Jacob the Grappling Hook) Also, my men said that a big van has been seen in the parking lot, which obviously SHOULD be vacant.

(Jacob goes to the weapons locker in the room and pulls out a military grade shotgun.)

Jacob: Show me. It sounds like we're going hunting! Not for the animals though, of course.

(At the Golden Lion Tamarin enclosure, the kids filled 2 animal carriers with a total of 6 monkeys)

Tara: I don't like this guys, no other guards have come by yet.  
Delmar: I'd say we're lucky! They don't suspect a thing!  
Tara: Well, it feels more like they're baiting us. I get the feeling that we're being watched.

(Tara is right. Through a telescope, Jacob and some of his soldiers are watching the kids. Jacob is less than pleased.)

Jacob: The NERVE of sneaking into my zoo and stealing endangered primates! Who ARE these kids!? They're obviously not stupid!  
Soldier: They seem to be very clever sir. Wait a minute, I think I recognize those kids!  
Jacob: You know 'em?  
Soldier: Not personally, but I know OF them. They're the Pines kids!  
Jacob: Dammit! Don't shoot them. Huxley, capture their friends in the parking lot. The rest of us will keep and eye on these kids and capture them when they try to escape!  
Huxley: Yes sir!

(Meanwhile, in the Parking Lot, Soos and Melody are chatting amongst themselves, and they have no idea that soldiers are slowly creeping up around the van)

Melody: Do their parents know they're doing this?  
Soos: I doubt it Dude.  
Melody: Oh no! They're gonna be so mad! I thought you didn't support this type of behavior!  
Soos: Melody, this dude is smuggling endangered animals, and no one knows it! If WE don't bring him to justice, who will?  
Melody: Well, you've got a point.

(Suddenly, the guards reveal their presence and aim their AK-47s at Soos and Melody)

Soldiers: Freeze! Come out of the van with your hands up!

Soos- oh no! We're doomed!  
Melody- I knew we should've just stayed home! Why couldn't you just talk them into F-CLORP instead?  
Soos- they didn't wanna and you know how hard it is to say 'no' to those 5 when they pull the 'puppy eyes' on you.

Soldier- I SAID GET OUTTA THE VAN! NOW!

(Soos and Melody get out of the van with their hands up. The soldiers then escort them to the main building, where Jacob Sarnoc is waiting for them)

Jacob: Well now! It seems I have guests! If I knew you were coming, I would have baked a cake!  
Soos: Do you really have cake?  
Melody: Soos, I doubt it.  
Jacob: Then again, had I known that you were planning to help steal my animals, maybe its GOOD that I didn't bake a cake!  
Melody: You're smuggling in illegal endangered animals!  
Jacob: Young Lady, I'm not evil, by any means, but I'll save the schtick for when we capture your friends!  
Soos: PLEASE just be gentle on them Dude!  
Jacob: I will, but I can't promise my men will be. I assure you, they will not resort to lethal force, as I know who they are, but we MIGHT need to be a BIT rough, if necessary.

(Meanwhile, with the kids, they start heading back to the gate with the carriers containing the 6 Golden Lion Tamarins, only to see from a distance that there are guards by the gate and the grappling hook is nowhere to be seen. The kids are hiding behind a bush, so the guards don't see them.)

Delmar: Okay, I did NOT expect guards by the gates!  
Annabel: Something is seriously wrong here! We might need to bug out!

(Tara uses her walkie talkie to try to call Soos, but gets no answer)

Tyrone: I don't like the way this plan is going!  
Marisol: Probably NONE of us do!

(The kids set the animal carriers containing the Golden Lion Tamarins down by an entrance to the "Employees Only" building. They enter it, not knowing that guards took the monkeys back to their enclosure. As the kids explore the building, finding a lab. They enter it, and what they find shocks them. There are giant tubes containing extinct or endangered animals of various types and the kids start walking through the lab)

Tyrone: Woah! Look at all of these extinct animals!  
Marisol: Yangtze River Dolphins, Carolina Parakeets, Japanese Sea Lions, Atlas Bears, Thylacines, Ratas Island Lizards, this guy's cloning extinct animals illegally as well!  
Delmar: How do we know it's illegal?  
Annabel: Well, all the animals were brought in illegally, so I think its safe to say that this is illegal too!  
Tara: What about that one? It's not extinct! (She points to a tube containing an Amur Leopard)  
Annabel: An Amur Leopard?  
Tyrone: They're not extinct, but they're critically endangered!  
Marisol: Well, maybe he's concerned about endangered animals so much, that he'd resort to illegal cloning to bring their numbers back up!  
Delmar: Well, it's still illegal!

(The kids take pictures of the cloning facility with their phones. after finishing that, they continue through the lab)

Annabel: I wonder where all of the guards are?  
Tyrone: They're probably setting up a trap for us outside!  
Delmar: Oh Tyrone, you worry too much!  
Tara: I think you're not worrying enough! Look!

(Tara points at a dry erase board that shows a chart showing results of some sort of experiment)

Delmar: It says "Plague results proved successful. Proving to be fatal to 65% of test subjects. More tests are required." What does that mean?  
Tara: It means that there's more to Jacob Sarnoc than meets the eye. He'd never experiment on animals, so what's he experimenting on?  
Annabel: Humans?  
Tyrone: I don't like the sound of that!  
Marisol: Shh! I hear voices!

(The kids hide behind some crates as two scientists walk in the room)

Scientist #1: Are the new finds from Gravity Falls holding up?  
Scientist #2: Yes Mr. Mulaek. (He holds up an animal carrier with a Gnome in it)  
Scientist #1: Please, just call me Frank. I still think that this is too crazy, even for the boss. A sentient life form on the same planet? Isn't that like imprisoning a person at the zoo just because they're short?  
Scientist #2: Frank, we're not showing this individual to the public, were gonna study him and release him after we've gathered the data we need!  
Frank: Answer me this: Why would the boss want a plague that can only effect humans? One with a high fatality rate, no less? Don't we at least have a cure?  
Scientist #2: Of course! We'd be dumb to NOT have a cure! Besides, if the magic from Gravity Falls is as powerful as it seems to be, it'll only affect the type of people the boss intends for it to affect, and everyone else will be safe. I'd tell you more, but that stuff's classified to you, I'm afraid.  
Frank: I know. I just wish I could know more about how the boss wants to make the world a better place, other than using extreme methods. Where should we put the Gnome?  
Scientist #2: I'll just put him in here for the time being. We have more tests to run and medical check-ups on the animals to do.

(With that, the 2 scientists leave the building. The kids check on the Gnome in the carrier)

Tara: Hey! It's Jeff! Jeff! Are you okay?  
Jeff: Kids! I'm doing okay, considering the situation, but I wanna get out of this place! I think that Jacob Sarnoc is plotting something evil or something! He also wants to capture more creatures from Gravity Falls for his scientists!

Tyrone- but what could he do? The Manotaur are huge so they'll probably have the scientists turn tail and run in fear.  
Annabel- Ty, they've got enough devices to knock 'em out and capture them. Just look at the non-supernatural creatures they have.  
Tyrone- well they can't capture a gremloblin!  
Tara- I'm sure if your dad was able to do it at our age, full grown bad guys could do it easily.  
Marisol- it seems we've got a lot more to face.  
Delmar- we really should've brought our parents to help.

~back at the Mystery Shack...~

Mabel- *walking in towards they den* hey Dipper!  
Dipper- *looks up from his laptop* Yeah?  
Mabel- is Soos still taking the kids out for Ice Cream?  
Dipper- that's what he said he was doing.  
Mabel- well yeah, I know, but it's been like an hour. I doubt the line would be that long.  
Dipper- ...you thinkin' they were all lying to us, too?  
Mabel- definitely. You still got those tracer on Anna and Ty's phones?  
Dipper- yep. You may have been against it, but it seems they'll come in handy now.  
Mabel- alright, let's get Wendy and go find 'em.

(They get Wendy and drive to the new zoo just outside town. When they arrive in the parking lot, they see the van. They go up to it and find that its abandoned)

Mabel: You know, I had a feeling that this would be the case!  
Dipper: I can't believe it! Soon lied to take the kids to a zoo!  
Wendy: But why would he take them when it was closed?  
Dipper: We need to find out! Let's look for them!

(They head to the gate. Seeing as it's locked, Wendy climbs a nearby tree and easily climbs over the gate and opens the gate for Dipper and Mabel and they shut it behind them to keep their presence a secret)

Mabel: It would've been so much easier if they didn't take the grappling hook.  
Wendy: How do you know they took it?  
Mabel: It wasn't where I left it last.  
Dipper: My phone shows them not too far from here!

(They follow the signal to the "Employees Only" building only to find that guards wielding AK-47s by the gate. They hide behind a bush to avoid detection)

Mabel: They're inside THERE?! They might be in so much trouble, its not even funny!  
Dipper: Would it be funny in the first place?  
Wendy: No, it wouldn't be funny. Relax guys, I'll take care of the guards.

(Wendy sneaks up to the guards and easily knocks them out. After hiding them in some bushes, they enter the building to look for their kids)

Tara- Annabel, Tyrone, why are your phones flashing?  
Annabel- say what?  
*they both take their phones out, on silent, but flashing*  
Marisol- I thought mom talked your dad out of putting those tracers on your phones!  
Delmar- we are definitely gonna be grounded when they find us.  
Tyrone- if we survive

Delmar: We'll survive Ty. What could-  
Marisol: Don't say it!

(Their parents, who entered the building catch up to them)  
Dipper: Annabel!  
Wendy: Tyrone!  
Mabel: Marisol! Delmar! Tara!

*Each parent hugs their respective children, Tara being left out of the equation*  
Dipper- we're so glad you're safe!  
*Wendy is kissing Tyrone on each cheek, making him blush*  
Mabel- how could you do this...  
Marisol- mom, you did the same thing at our age.  
Delmar- what's wrong with us doing the same thing?  
Mabel- lemme finish kids; how could do this... WITHOUT US?  
Dipper- we're all for you kids trying to do the right thing.  
Wendy- but it's best you have us to help.  
Annabel- we already had adult supervision.  
Tyrone- yeah, Uncle Soos is helping.  
Wendy- and where is he?  
Tara- ...uh-oh.

Dipper, Wendy, and Mabel: "Uh oh"?!  
Tara: We think he might have been captured!  
Jeff: Before you go save him, could you guys PLEASE let me out?  
Tyrone: Oh! Right! Sorry Jeff!

(Tyrone unlocks the cage Jeff is in, and he hops out)

Jeff: I heard a voice similar to his in the building, so he's probably here!  
Annabel: We also heard that he was making some sort of human only disease with a high fatality rate!  
Wendy: A disease?! Why would he want that?  
Dipper: What else did he say?  
Marisol: He also said something about making a cure for it and having it be modified with magic from Gravity Falls!  
Delmar: I didn't even know Gravity Falls HAD magic! But, apparently, it does!  
Mabel: C'mon! We've gotta stop him!

(The group races through the building and finds an abnormally large air duct that can fit them. They crawl through it and through a vent, they see a room filled with animal cages containing creatures from Gravity Falls, ranging from Chutzpah, The Gremoblin, The Several Timez guys, and Celestabellebethabelle. There are also scientists working on some experiments with them, starting with the Unicorn hooked up to lots of machines, normally used for medicine)

Scientist#1(Named Wally): Hook up that Unicorn tight now Gavin.  
Celestabellebethabelle: The nerve! Doing horrible experiments on someone as pure of heart as ME?!  
Gavin: From what the others told us when we caught you, you're nowhere NEAR being "pure of heart".  
Celestabellebethabelle: Lies! All of what you say are filthy lies! I'm so pure of heart, the essence of it flows from my mane!

(Gavin flips a switch, sending electric energy into her, causing her to scream, and Mabel smiles at it, know how much of a hypocrite the unicorn really is)

Wally: It seems that she's not very resistant to shock therapy and most medicines. Is keeping these creatures really wise if they get sick?  
Gavin: We have to try to understand how they work if they're to be preserved. How's the plague coming along? Is it ONLY affecting evil people who hate animals and senselessly kill them for no reason?  
Wally: Thanks to the magic of Gravity Falls, yes. It's nearly ready to be unleashed into the most polluted and overpopulated areas of the world. We just need a few more tests.

(Wally hands Gavin some papers with people's pictures on them.)

Wally: The poachers we experimented on dropped quickly, but I'm unsure about the final test subject, Mr. Northwest

(This shocks the others who are still hiding in the ducts. A deadly human plague was being made, and now, Pacifica's evil father, Preston, was gonna be a test subject! Even so, the group knows they wouldn't stand a chance here, so they continue to listen and watch Wally and Gavin)

Gavin: What do we even know about Preston?  
Wally: I have his dossier right here.

(Wally hands Gavin a file about Pacifica's evil dad and he reads it)

Gavin: Holy crud! This guy sounds like the type of evil you'd reserve for a movie, not real life! Poaching, kidnapping, ransoming, countless credit card thefts, being a freelance assassin, child abuse to an insanely high degree, happily attempting to sell out his entire family just to join forces with an evil demon, and even illegal animal smuggling!  
Wally: Um, the last part is pretty much what WE do, you know.  
Gavin: Yeah, but WE'RE doing it for a good cause, not for MONEY. Okay, money's a PART of it, but only a minor thing in the grand scheme of the boss!  
Wally: I guess so, but every other animal we've brought to our zoos were less intelligent than humans are! That "Manotaur" or whatever and the gnome are SENTIENT!  
Gavin: I know what, but if the "Manotaur" thinks big muscles and destroying stuff is "Manly" they're obviously too brain dead to live.  
Wally: So are a LOT of "people" from Gravity Falls! (Chuckles)  
Gavin: Well, you're right about THAT! Ha ha!

(In the ducts, the group whispers amongst each other)

Tara: Well, these guys have officially made it to the stop of my "Biggest Evil Morons" list. Actually, second only to Auntie Pacifica's dad. They just insulted my entire hometown! Only my mom's 2 deputies are THAT dumb.  
Annabel: I think this mess is bigger than all of us!

Wendy- kids, it seems likes these guys aren't completely evil.  
Dipper- unfortunately their motives are good, but the way they're going about it is wrong.  
Mabel- you kids just stay back while we take them out and let these creatures free... but probably not Celestabellebethabelle.  
Dipper- Mabel...  
Mabel- fine, we'll save her last.

Delmar- guys, you can't keep holding us back.  
Annabel- yeah, you do all the fighting and just expect us to watch?  
Marisol- We can help too!

Tara- should we get in on this... Tyrone?

*Unbeknownst to all of them, Tyrone has already snuck down with Jeff and they are both unlocking the cages, the scientists not noticing*

Tyrone(whispering): There you guys go! Go free to Gravity Falls!  
Chutzpah(whispering as well): Tyrone! What're you doing here?  
Jeff(also whispering): We're trying to set you free!

(After unlocking all of the cages, Chutzpah sneaks over to the scientists and knocks them out)

Chutzpah: There! I've been in that cage for hours now!

(The rest of the group comes down out of the vents)

Wendy: Tyrone! Please don't run off without us!  
Tyrone: Mom, Jeff and I freed these guys! We're gonna need help!  
Delmar: He's got a point Auntie Wendy.

(The group runs through the building and they find the room where Soos and Melody are being held. Jacob Sarnoc is also there, with a bunch of soldiers wielding high tech futuristic stun rifles.

Jacob: Well now! More guests! The famous Pines twins as well.  
Tara: We know what you're trying to do! You're making a plague that can wipe out humanity! Why are you doing this?!  
Jacob: Simple. We have all of this potential, all this technology, but we've squandered it. Our population is expanding to a point where our poor planet can't support it. We have no real predators or anything, and the only thing we focus on is making our population bigger, changing the climate, polluting, wasting resources, and condemning our race to extinction by overpopulation. The only thing that makes sense to us is money. MONEY! Just a bunch of worthless paper and metal!  
But not us. No. We saw far more. We saw means of changing the world for the better! Ever wonder how those rainforests have been mysteriously expanding, despite horrible foresters depleting them? That was OUR doing! We have giant terraforming machines! We've been replenishing glaciers and restoring rainforests and coral reefs! Once this plague is unleashed, all of the people obsessed with destruction and money will perish, depleting our population to a point where our planet can support it again!  
Delmar: Don't you find this slightly...evil?  
Jacob: No. It's what's necessary to preserve life on earth! In case that fails, we DO have a backup plan. For years, we've actually been terraforming Mars to make new habitats for animals, the true owners of our world! The few Martian colonists will have strict laws to keep our numbers low, and we'll treasure the rescued animals and tell their children about the wonders that were. On Earth, they might all go extinct by our selfish, greedy hands, but on Mars, they'll thrive!  
Annabel: Why not just focus on that?  
Jacob: What if something goes wrong? What if some twisted individuals try to bomb our colonies just for the sake of destroying? It's our nature to be violent, wasteful, and short sighted.  
Mabel: DO you even have a cure for this plague?  
Jacob: Of course we do! It would be stupid to not have one.  
Marisol: That's such a negative view of the world!  
Jacob: True, but very accurate.  
Annabel: That's not true! There are lots of good people in the world too!  
Jacob: Whatever, I'm offering you a way out. Leave my masterpiece zoo and only come back as guests, and I'll forget this whole thing ever happened.

Dipper- NO! Your plan is so asinine! Yes, there are bad people, but the world is not yours to judge and do with what you please.  
Mabel- we've faced an evil entity with an even grander plan for the entire universe, but we've taken him down and we can take you down too, with help.  
Jacob- you say this, but look at the allies around you. The magical creatures of gravity falls must hide just so they are not destroyed. If most of the human race is eliminated they'll be able to roam free instead of hide.

Marisol: Gravity Falls is an awesome sanctuary for them!  
Jacob: One single place is not enough. Soon, our population will crowd them out, and the planet will have no room for any life except humans! This is about preserving life as we know it! I refuse to let Earth become a lifeless, polluted wasteland!

(Jacob pulls out a remote)

Jacob: Now, when I press this big shiny red button, this will give the green light to my operatives in the most corrupted, polluted parts of the world to unleash the plague. I'll be remembered as the greatest hero to the animal kingdom!  
Annabel: You're insane!  
Jacob: I beg to differ. That demon you faced was insane. He merely wanted to destroy. I'm different. I want to preserve!  
Delmar: Preserve by killing billions of people? Yeah, that's real legit.

(Jacob presses a green button on the remote, and a screen with numbers shows up)

Jacob: Do you see that screen? That shows our population. See how fast the number is rising? When the plague is unleashed, we've calculated 2 outcomes. It will either stop rising, or start dropping. If everything goes according to plan, our population will decrease to a manageable 5 billion. Maybe even 4.5 billion.  
Wendy: That's over 3 billion people dying!  
Jacob: Believe me, it'll only be the scum of our planet who'll be affected. Needless to say, that'll be quite a lot.  
Dipper: I've never seen someone to negative about the human race!  
Mabel: Does your family know what you do and what you're doing?  
Jacob: Highly doubtful, but if my son, Hal, were to find out about this, he'd definitely not approve. He's my successor!

(Meanwhile, Tyrone is planning an attack with the magical creatures of Gravity Falls)

Tyrone(whispering): Okay guys, we need a plan! I dunno if we'll be able to stop him from pressing that button with all of his guys aiming stun rifles at us, but we can stop him from capturing anymore of you guys!  
Jeff: Gnomes aren't meant to be in zoos!

(Back with others)

Wendy: Words are never gonna convince you to stop this insane plan, will they?  
Jacob: No, they won't convince me. When I was young, Preston Northwest attempted to poach an elephant at my father's zoo! He failed, but it ruined my father's reputation as a good zookeeper! When I rebuilt myself, I vowed to find a way to rid the world of scum like the Northwests! Save for Pacifica, of course. I know at least she's trying to make good.

(Jacob presses the red button on the remote, and, as planned, the population counter stops rising)

Wendy: What you done?!  
Jacob: I'll tell you what I've done, I just saved the world! As our numbers of terrorists, animal abusers, polluters, and resource wasters start to drop dead from this wondrous feat of science, our planet's burden will be eased so much, life can start to recover! I can finally get my special machines to clean out the Yangtze river! At the moment, though, it would seem that our population is at the point where births and deaths are happening at the same ratio!  
Dipper: What about the good people?!  
Mabel: Are they gonna drop dead as well?!  
Jacob: Thanks to the magic of Gravity Falls, no. They'll all survive, and the world gets a fresh, new start!

(Unknown to our heroes, Tyrone snuck back into the lab, where he easily defeats the scrawny scientists, Wally and Gavin, and ties them up. After that, he frees the Lilliputtians and rallies them)

Tyrone: Guys! We need your help! Some guy unleashed a plague that's gonna kill billions of people! For the Pines family, can you please help me save everyone!  
Lilliputtians: Yeah!

(Back with Jacob and the rest of our heroes, Jacob pulls out a memory gun)

Soos: Dude! Where did you get that?!  
Jacob: Simple! Before Old Man McGucket went nuts long ago, my father commissioned him to make him this wondrous invention! I'm not gonna kill you if I don't have to, I'd rather have you simply forget what you saw here, and be amazed at my masterpiece zoo, and the kinder, gentler world the plague will leave behind when villains go extinct!  
Melody: Are you gonna use this on your son too?!  
Jacob: Goodness! No. Like I said before, my successor doesn't have any idea about my heroic actions in ridding our poor planet of evil.

Soos- well how are you supposed to ensure that your kid will end up like you? Not all kids are 100% copies of their parents  
Dipper- yeah, just look at our kids... wait, where's Tyrone?

*suddenly the machine showing the countdown begins to default, the numbers scrambling and changing rapidly. Inside the machine, the Lilliputtians are pulling out wires, destroying circuits and generally making a mess of the inner workings*

Jacob: What in the world?! Guards! Find that kid!

(A few guards with stun rifles run off to find Tyrone, only to knocked out by him when they enter another room. Tyrone steals a stun rifle from them and enters the main room)

Wendy: Tyrone! You took out the guards!  
Annabel: That's my bro bro!  
Jacob: You're becoming a nuisance!

(Jacob fires the memory gun at Tyrone, but he dodges. This prompts the other members of the group to start fighting the guards)

Annabel- it's about time you start fighting back, bro!  
Tyrone- It's easier when you have mythical creatures as back-up... *glances at Celestabellebethabelle * even if some of them won't really fight...  
Wendy- not to mention you've got lumberjack genes, hon! *throws a guard full-bodily at the wall*

Tyrone: I haven't had this much fun since we wrestled that mutated turtle!  
Tara: That was surreal!

(Jacob sets the memory gun to "Tyrone Pines")

Jacob: Try this! Kiss your memories goodbye!

(He aims the gun at a distracted Tyrone, but Dipper naturally won't stand for it)

Dipper: Not on my watch you crazed nut job!

(Enraged, he tackles Jacob, causing the shot to barely miss Tyrone)

Wendy: Thats the way Hon!  
Mabel: You go Bro!

(Soon, all of the soldiers have been defeated, leaving our heroes with Jacob, who's pinned to the ground by Dipper with his highly superior strength against the thin man)

Dipper: You've got a lot of nerve, trying to erase every memory my son has!  
Jacob: Well, you've got nerve beating up my army and trying to disrupt my operations!  
Wendy: You unleashed a plague!  
Jacob: I'm doing this for the good of the planet! Our race is corrupt, and needs to have its horrid numbers drop!  
Mabel: You really worship Thomas Hobbes' opinions, don't you? You're almost as bad as Celestabellebethabelle!

(Everyone looks at her)

Mabel: Almost!  
Jacob: Well, there's no way you'll be able to close down this zoo, or relate the cure for the plague!  
Mabel: You're only half right there Mr. Bad Guy! My Bro Bro is a tech wiz!

(Mabel picks up the Memory Gun and aims it at Jacob)

Mabel: Tell you what, how about I just erase the memories of tonight from you, my brother releases the cure, and we just visit your ultimate zoo as guests and get free stuff? I'll let you keep the Unicorn!  
Celestabellebethabelle: You dare leave someone so pure-  
Mabel: You're the single worst thing aside from Bill, you piece of trash! You're even worse than Jacob!

Dipper- Mabel... we can't just pick and choose who we save. That won't make us heroes.  
Mabel- but-!  
Delmar- seriously mom...  
Marisol- ...we gotta get her out too.  
Wendy- three against one sis!  
Annabel- make that 4!

Mabel: Argh! Why do I have to do this?!  
Chutzpah: We'll see to it that the Unicorn is punished properly.  
Celestabellebethabelle: The nerve of you. I'm so-  
Mabel: You're not "pure of heart"!  
Tyrone: You didn't even help us fight!  
Delmar: Don't use your "pure of heart" stuff as an excuse! We know you're not even remotely pure of heart!

(Mabel wipes the memories of the bad guys with the gun after they were knocked out and Dipper goes to to a large computer console in the lab where Preston is held prisoner and the cure is stored)

Annabel: So Dad, you think you can release the cure before our race goes extinct?  
Dipper: I certainly can! Let's see, we reconfigure the matrix of the machine to "release", insert this microchip in the machine's mainframe, this'll render the command status to send out a cancellation signal, as well as an "emergency status, signaling the workers in other parts of the world, and presto! The cure is released! Our race is saved!

(Everyone is amazed by Dipper's intelligence)

Mabel: Wow Dipper, you've spent more time with ford than I thought!  
Wendy: Is there anyway to tell how many bad people perished from the plague?  
Dipper: That's doubtful, with the countdown machine broken.  
Annabel: Maybe a billion people!  
Marisol: Well, no more people are gonna get the plague now!  
Dipper: Guys, we did it!  
Lilliputtians: We think we all owe it to Tyrone!

(Everyone applauds Tyrone, and Tara walks up to him)

Tara: Here's a gift for you Tyrone!

(Tara kisses him)

Marisol: She's doing it! They're in love!  
Annabel: He's so lucky to have people like her in his life!  
Delmar: I KNEW they'd do it soon!  
Tyrone: Thanks Tara. (Blushes)

(The next day, the families are all at the same zoo, enjoying the wondrous exotic animals that they saved)

Annabel: Well Guys, all that hero stuff really pays off in moments like this!  
Tyrone: I second that notion!

(Tyrone is carrying a huge bottle of Mountain Dew and a Souvenir Popcorn bucket, while Tara is carrying a Komodo Dragon Plushie)

Delmar: Where did you get all of that?!  
Tyrone: It was free!  
Tara: 2 of the scientists, Wally and Gavin didn't get their memories wiped last night, so we made a deal with them! We keep the secrets of what happened last night and let them continue benevolent research, and we get everything free here!  
Delmar: That sounds like a sweet deal!  
Marisol: Delmar, they might try unleashing the plague again!  
Tara: That's doubtful, they're sticking to terraforming Mars now. When I told mom about this, she assigned some of her most competent officers to keep an eye on them.  
Tyrone: Auntie Candy doesn't usually let any bad guys off the hook, regardless of how major or minor the crime might be.  
Tara: Well, I told her the truth about them having good intentions, but evil methods of doing so. She was also amazed when I told her about Tyrone's heroics!

(She gently hugs Tyrone when they all sit on a bench, and then Tyrone does something unexpected. He kisses Tara, making her beam at him and blush. The other kids are all happily surprised as well!)

Tara: Oh my! Tyrone!  
Annabel: That's my bro bro!

Wendy- *nudges Dipper* seems your son moves faster than you!  
*Dipper blushes, but puts an arm around his wife anyway*

(They kiss)

Mabel: C'mon everyone! This is picture perfect!

(Mabel takes a picture of the family)


End file.
